Are You Over 50 And Starting To Date Again For The First Time In Years?
Dating does not come without challenges, no matter who you are. But, if you are over 50 it comes with a unique set of challenges. There are many. Below are a few of the most common.
First Challenge: It’s been decades
Online dating is unfamiliar territory.
You could be divorced after a long marriage (or took a long break thereafter). Or, you are widowed and finding yourself in a place you never thought you’d be. Regardless of the circumstance, you are now starting to realize that you are ready to open yourself up to new possibilities. While unexpected, you want to see what can come out of the next chapter in your life.
It’s daunting, it’s scary. And, it’s a giant leap out of your comfort zone.
Here’s the good news! You can do it! And, you are not alone.
One thing about online dating you may not realize: It’s new to everyone. It’s awkward for everyone.
You think because you are older, online dating isn’t the right place for you. You think to yourself, that’s what “the kids are doing.”
Not true. There are sites like OurTime and Silver Singles, so it’s NOT just for the kids.
And, even though it starts off unfamiliar and awkward, it doesn’t mean you will always feel that way. You will get used to it, just as you have when chartering any new landscape.
Here’s something you can’t argue with: No matter what, you are not the only person dipping their toe in for the first time. Everyone is going through the same thing. You are among newbs.
Second Challenge: Scammers.
This is an unfortunate reality for folks over 50. It’s aggravating, frustrating and a downright bummer. However, people can’t sell what you won’t buy. Knowing is half the battle
You can report these accounts, and you should, but for yourself, the best thing you can do is ignore them and block them. Don’t fall for it, let it go and move on.
If instead, you let it get to you, if you let it make you angry and bitter then all you are doing is giving them power. You are giving them the power to take away your potential future happiness with an amazing wonderful person.
How to spot them? They usually have a sob story in order to engage your heartstrings. They live abroad and explain why that can’t make plans to actually meet you. They only use one photo of themselves.
Ultimately, your money is what they are after. Don’t give it to them.
If you want to dig deeper to get a handle on what to look for then do a little research. There are tons of resources and articles online that will help you steer clear of these invasive people.
Third Challenge: You are set in your ways.
This last one may not get in your way when it comes to simple dating but could get your way when it comes to developing a more serious relationship.
When you are older you’re used to living a certain way and accustomed to your routine. You were a bit more amiable when you were younger, right? When you were younger, you (generally) hadn’t figured yourself out yet so it was easier to go about growth and evolution alongside someone else.
You are less wiggly now. It’s understandable. But, it’s a choice and that is on you. If you don’t want to make accommodations and compromises with someone new then that limitation is on you. Open-communication and effort toward understanding each other are vital at this stage of the game, and your willingness to do that is something you get to decide.
So, if you genuinely want to meet the next special man or woman in your life and you want to date then approach it with an open mind and an open heart. Think about it this way, that other person is going to have to do the same for you.
At the end of the day, dating isn’t always easy. However, the challenges may be worth the reward. You will never know unless you try. And, being too old or set in your ways is an excuse you let get in your way. If meeting a new special someone is something you really want in life, all you have to do is put yourself out there.
Dating should be easy-going and fun. Strategy in dating is relevant, but try not to get caught up on the do’s and don’ts and the shoulds and should nots. Be your natural self.
As always, have fun! And, Happy Dating.
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