This post is a long overdue follow up to my original post, What Not To Write On Your Online Dating Profile.
Working on a post that exemplifies what not to write in a dating profile is always a most amusing exercise. I laugh, I cry, I’m outraged. But, ultimately, I’m disappointed. Because behind these poorly written profiles are probably countless great men.
Guys, my apologies for picking on you, but it’s the only perspective I have. I have no doubt plenty of women aren’t so hot either.
Yes, online dating is frustrating. However, if you give any consideration to what you are doing maybe the outcome would be different. Online dating is what WE make of it. All the dating sites are just a platform, it’s up to us to build our brand.
Here are some of my favorite examples of what not to do (all copied verbatim):
I got an email the other day from “Joey.” He writes, “I was wondering if you would like to talk a little bit, if you’re interested mail me back and we can find out a little more out about each other. I hope to hear back from you. Joey”
Total form letter. I bet 100 bucks Joey copies and pastes that message into every email he sends. And, I wouldn’t be surprised if he sends it to every single girl he can just to see what happens. While I get that dating is partially a numbers game, I like to know the men I date are selective and want to meet those who are most likely right for them.
I’m a benefit of the doubt person, so I continue on to view his profile. He says this about himself: I’m a ‘tell it like it is’ person. Have a sense of humor. Looking for someone to enjoy the things I like.
So, what is it you like, Joey? I’m all for a little ambiguity and intrigue. In fact, I incorporate that a lot into the profiles I write. But! To basically say nothing at all, especially when you criteria lies solely in having the same interests? And, to boot, it sounds like women are only allowed to like exactly what he likes. C’mon.
Joey is probably pissed that no one will write him back. He’s probably confused and doesn’t understand. It’s all the fault of online dating! He’s not to blame.
This one made my eyes bug out:
Please do not continue to read if you are not over your Ex, you have commitment issues, are in a relationship, have enough baggage for a small village, are in jail, have multiple personalities, are a pyromaniac, have more than three duck face pictures in your profile, or lie cheat and steal.*
*while you still might be able to be a productive member(s) of society and everyone has some baggage, let’s just not kid ourselves into thinking it might work out.
Woah! Bitter much? He even had a disclaimer! But, his profile does nothing for sharing who he is, what he’s all about. Complaining about women and about dating is not going to get you a date. (But, hey, thanks for the insight into what women are doing wrong)
Here’s another one:
It’s way too difficult to have a conversation on this site. I keep reaching out but can’t get a response. Why is this? Is everyone on here taken? Lol.
In the end, the rest of this guy’s profile wasn’t that bad, but the way he starts out is. I don’t want to talk to a guy who is down on himself. Woe is me, no one messages me, boo hoo. Have some confidence. Don’t knock the system. If you don’t like it, don’t do it.
Lastly, How is this a dating profile:
I look at things from a very rational point of view. I believe that if you just apply a little logic, you can solve any problem.
Good to know. Unfortunately, I have zero idea why I should message this guy, much less go out on a date with him. I’m simply baffled. What???
In an effort not to go on and on and on, I will stop here. (Believe me, this could be never-ending.)
If you are anything like me, you are busy. You genuinely care about dating and sincerely want to meet your special someone, but dating is one more thing you have to put on your ‘to do’ list. Time is precious and you don’t want to waste it on someone who right off the bat seems like a dud. Especially if you have standards – your absolute right. Ladies and gentlemen, don’t miss out on a great person who wants to meet you because you have a less than desirable dating profile.
There are many opinions out there about how your profile should be. In my humble opinion, the best thing you can do is show you care. Be thoughtful and be confident.