I recently saw an online dating profile that said “Don’t worry, we can lie about how we met.”

Why? What is wrong with saying you met the love of your life online? Why is there still such a stigma around this form of dating that half of the population uses?

From shopping to working to friendship, in 2023 there is no aspect of our lives that is not touched by the internet. Dating is no exception, and while talking to a match through a screen can feel inorganic at times, there’s no reason it can’t be just as romantic as any other chance encounter.

I’ve seen profiles on dating sites where people are openly embarrassed to be using the platform, writing things like “I probably shouldn’t have made this account in the first place,” or “I guess it’s come to this…” This shows that, not only are they unsure in their own dating journey, but also at least partly judgmental of others who are using the websites. 

If you are one of the hundreds of millions of people that chose to use online dating, you should dive in headfirst, with no hesitation. By uploading your profile, you are opening yourself to the world and saying “Here I am, ready to meet the person for me.” After that there is no point in pulling back and playing the too-cool card or pretending that you are somehow “above” using Tinder, Bumble, or Match.com.

Others may lie about how they meet people because they feel a pressure to manufacture a more “traditional” story. Something in the vein of a classic meet-cute, with the stars aligning and two people crossing paths in an unexpected romantic way. You know the scene: two people colliding on the street with papers flying everywhere. Or brushing fingers as they both reach for the same book in the bookstore. Eyes lock. Cue music. 

But aren’t the stars aligning when your profile and theirs (out of the 75 million profiles in the Tinderverse), match? Isn’t it some kind of fate that your conversation didn’t fizzle out in the graveyard of past match messages? 

There are so many people, so many perfect matches, that would have never met if they hadn’t been dating online. While approaching or being approached in real life can definitely work, there are a slew of obstacles that online dating eliminates. When you’re on a dating platform, you can confirm that everyone you’re interested in is single, searching, and attracted to you. 

Many couples I know in real life have met online— and their relationships are full of as much romance as you could imagine.

They remember their first messages to each other. Remember which photos stood out from the others’ profile. Remember how it felt to see each other in person for the first time after chatting online. And they remember these details fondly, because it’s part of their love story. 

The truth is, with the right person, the details of how you met are always going to be romantic. Because (due to whatever fate or destiny or algorithm), you met. And the real love story is what comes next. 

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